apologies for yesterday's pre-mid-life crisis.
i am in a far better mood. infact i dont think i have been in such a good mood for a long time. today i have acomplished alot and in the process realised just how fucking amazing all my friends are.
so anyway, just got back from the clinic after a very positive outcome which, hopeless desperation aside, has given my mind a nice portion of clearance. it's what i have been in desperate need of.
normally in the morning's i have to listen to whole album before i feel i can get up and start doing stuff but this morning i woke up, put on interpol's 'turn on the bright lights' and by the end of the first track i was already starting to feel awake and ready to tackle the day ahead. it as at this point that i knew everything was going to start to be ok again.
when i returned home this evening i went up to my room and tidied it. thats something that i never have the motivation to do. this put me in a happier mood as i could see my floor with this in mind i proceeded to lie in the middle of my room, on the floor, and listen to mazzy star 'among my swan' on repeat for roughly two hours. normally this album would send me spiraling into fits of sorrow but this time round it brought new meaning and calm to my mind.
i know this sounds really 'oh wow i've found myself' but i assure you that is not the case at all. im just starting to understand myself better. mind games and misunderstandings aside, i think im on the right track.